Tuesday, May 31, 2005

Calling On Your Considerable Vocational Expertise

Now that Mateo's done with his masters degree, it's time for Spurious to go back to school. Hooray! An excuse to pick up a Hello Kitty pencilbox with 600 springloaded-compartments! Um, sorry.

I’m thinking of becoming an RN (a registered nurse), but I'm not sure how to begin. Where does one start? I’m pretty sure you can’t just march into a hospital and scream, "LET ME MINISTER TO YOUR AFFLICTIONS!!!", you have to go to school…but where?

I’ve been working in hospitals, at least in an administrative capacity, since the earth’s crust was cooling and dinosaurs roamed the earth. How the hell I wound up working in the magical world of medicine with a BA in English Lit is puzzling in itself. One day I was minding my business, disinterestedly discussing The Farie Queen (I fucking hated The Farie Queen), and the next day I was reviewing neurosurgery instructions with a patient and writing a grant. WTF?

The patients have always been the best part (and the most frustrating part) of all these jobs. Being with them while they travel down the road of their illness, regardless of the outcome, has always the most satisfying part to me. I loved being able to make things better for them if I could. It always rankled me that I couldn't be there with the patient directly, but by becoming a nurse, I finally can.

Cause I sure as hell ain't going to medical school for the next 9 years.

So do any of you know how nurses become nurses? Or do they spring forth from the forehead of Zeus, like I’ve always imagined? Email me at

Spuriousplum at gmail dot com

or comment below and help a sister out. Cause I can’t wait to minister me some afflictions.
Random Fruit Fact: The Persimmon

"The ripe fruits are two to three inches in diameter, nearly always seedless, and pasty."

So if you like pastiness (hey, it takes all kinds), get your persimmon on. Learn more about the persimmon, here.

Posted by Spurious Nurse at 5/31/2005 02:44:00 PM


  1. Blogger LadyBug posted at 3:10 PM  
    I don't know, Plum. I'm thinking marching into a hospital and shouting, ""LET ME MINISTER TO YOUR AFFLICTIONS!!!" would definitely get you some results.

    Of course, if straight-jackets and crayons aren't the results you're looking for, you might search for a nursing school in your area. Or a college with a nursing program.

    Or visit Spoonleg over at Spelunk in the Trunk (http://spelunk.blogspot.com/). She's a nurse. Maybe she can fill you in on all the dirty little details.
  2. Blogger Annejelynn posted at 6:04 PM  
    owp! ladybug beat me to it - I was gonna tell you to talk to Spoony about bein' a nurse. I have a girlfriend who works in a neo-natal care dept in a univ. hospital and she loves it. Her older sis and her mother are both nurses too. They each work four 12-hr shifts, with 3 days off inbetween.
  3. Blogger Southern Fried Girl posted at 6:51 PM  
    Well being that your major is not nursing, you will have to do a lot of pre-reqs first. My advice to you is to go to the nearest university with a nursing department and talk to an advisor and get the lo down so you don't waste a lot of time and money.
  4. Blogger spoonleg posted at 11:36 PM  

    Well, you have a BA so a lot of your pre-reqs are probably already taken care of. There will be a few others that are specific to nursing, such as microbiology, chemistry and anataomy and physiology. You can count on maybe a year or so of "other" classes before you start on the hardcore nursing stuff.

    First of all, try applying for financial aid (if you qualify) and get your transcripts and letters of recommendation together from your previous university experience. Also, since you work for a hospital check into their tuition reimbursement policy. My hospital is paying for me to go back and get my master's degree. Most of them will help, at the very least.

    Check out www.allnursingschools.com to get a list of any schools in your area. You'll need to decide whether you want an Associate's Degree RN or a Bachelor's Degree RN. Narrow your selection to two or three nursing programs that appeal most to you, your location, your budget, and what you hope to get out of your nursing school experience. Your best bet might be to find a nursing school which is a part of a larger university, if you want any sort of continuity. That way you can be clear on what THAT PARTICULAR nursing school requires prior to being admitted into an upper-level program and you can meet those requirements within the university without worrying about the credits transferring. Along with the above mentioned classes, you might have to take a nutrition course, a statistics course, and a few semesters of spanish if you haven't done these already. Apply to the general university under an INTENDED nursing major, and then once you finish the pre-reqs you'll automatically be accepted (assuming your GPA is not appallingly low).

    If you want to go the other route, that is take care of your pre-reqs prior to applying to a nursing program, you'll still first need to narrow down your options. Find one or two nursing schools that appeal to you, identify their requirements for admission, and find out which local community colleges they accept transfer credits from. Then go enroll in those classes and transfer your credits when ready.

    Good luck! I hope this made sense. Email me if you want more info or any help along the way! Nursing school TOTALLY SUCKS, really truly sucks... you've been warned! But if you love what you do, it's all worthwhile.
  5. Anonymous lawbrat posted at 7:18 AM  
    You go girl! Your going to be a student. You know what that means, right? You get to look at all the young, male co-eds. WooHoo. Of course they wont compare to Mateo, but its fun to look.
    I'm excited for you.
  6. Blogger Susie posted at 8:35 AM  
    I got nothing, except to say sounds like spoonie is your go-to girl, here, and I think you'll be a WONDERFUL nurse. In my world view, good nurses and good teachers are the most valuable members of society. That is all.
  7. Blogger Random and Odd posted at 9:57 AM  
    Yep, what Susie said.
  8. Blogger Spurious Plum posted at 10:01 AM  
    Ladybug- Well, I'll try the shouty way first, and we'll see if I get arrested. Crayons rock.

    Annejelynn-3 days off in-between shifts? Where can I sign up?

    SFG- I think I need to od a 2nd degree BSN (bachelor's of science in nursing) but I'll have to do more research. Maybe I can be a fruit nurse...

    Spoonie- Oh, hooray! Thanks for stopping by. I need all the help I can get. You're soooo gettign email.

    Lawbrat- Male co-eds! Damn. If I could only get these Mateo-is-a-fox goggles off...

    Susie- Thanks for the good wishes! Here's hoping I don't run screaming down the street when I see a cadaver...

    Kristine- Ahh, sweet validation. Thanks!
  9. Blogger Squirl posted at 8:03 PM  
    OMG, that is so cool that you want to be a nurse. I think you'll be very good at it. As my mother was in the hospital weekend before last, besides the necessary medical knowledge, I noticed that a great sense of humor is what's needed. You're getting an A+ in that course!

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